I always try to squat down when I'm talking to or petting my cat while they're sitting on the floor. Why? Because it puts you more on their level and that makes them more comfortable.
Think about this for just a minute. If you had a giant looming over you, wouldn't that make you just a bit uncomfortable? Gulliver's Travels comes to mind! This is just one way to try to see things as your cat sees them.
People often just thrust their hand out toward the cats face to pet it. Another scary thing. Try slowly moving your hand in toward their neck area and scratching their chin first. Then move up to the rest of the head. It's a lot less frightening than a huge hand coming at their face.
We just have to remember that to them we are big... and that can be intimidating. Cats hate being intimated and don't react well to it. You have to also remember that in the cat's mind, they rule... they are king, or queen, of the jungle. They don't like to look scared as it ruins their superior, aloof attitude. Let's face it, that's one of the things we love about cats!
Another thing that's confusing to them is that they can scratch on that carpet covered scratching post, but not the carpet. Now, how in the heck are they suppose to tell the difference since they are both the same material? One good thing that's being done more now is they are making scratching posts out of sisal instead of carpet. Not only do cats love sisal, but it helps to keep them from thinking carpet is what you scratch on.
Something I hear people complain a lot about it is their cat suddenly biting them while being petted. First of all, a cat will usually start flicking their tail back and forth when irritated. So if you see them doing this, stop petting them. Are they being mean or difficult? No.
I used to have a boyfriend that, when we were cuddled up watching TV, would rub my arm. At first it felt nice, but after awhile it was annoying. My skin would actually start to hurt. He would be so wrapped up in the show we were watching he forgot he was doing it! I would tell him to stop, but our cats can't tell us... well, not in words anyway.
The twitching of the tail is their way of saying, "stop," but if we don't notice it they will bite or swat you. Their not being mean, their just using the only ways they have to talk to you. They may not want to move out of your lap, they just want you to stop petting. If I couldn't have actually told my boyfriend to stop rubbing my arm, I probably would have resorted to some physical method to get him to stop too!
By trying to understand how our cat sees things it makes it a lot easier to get rid of some of their habits that we don't like, such as biting or swatting at us. Try to put yourself in their place and think of how you would feel. It's really simple to figure out most of it and you and your cat will not only get along better, but have a stronger bond.
